Improve Your Sex Life: Sex Resolutions to Make Now (Whether You're in a Relationship or Not) by Mary Jo Rapini, LPC

It is crucial to continue to improve our sexual journeys with ourselves or partners. We make new years resolutions, but why not sex resolutions? Sex resolutions are great to think about whether it’s for you or a partner in 2023.

When making a sex resolution, it’s important to be open and honest and make sure they’re ultimately benefiting yourself. To get the creative inspiration going, take note on areas of your sex life you want to improve. Then have one to two ideas for each improvement and choose the one that you’d most likely stick to in the new year. The ideas below can provide some inspiration.

What You Should Consider

• Being confident in yourself. You have the opportunity (whether in a relationship or not) to get more comfortable being in your own skin. The more comfortable you feel in your own skin, the more confident and comfortable you’ll be in exploring yourself and your sexuality.

• Practice being more assertive of your needs. Practicing verbal affirmations is crucial to your sexual pleasure. We’ve all had experiences where something didn’t feel good, and we didn’t say anything. Hopefully you feel comfortable enough with your partner that you can express your pleasure, but the more you let them know to change the tempo, or be gentler, the better you’ll communicate and the better you’ll feel. You can also guide your partner nonverbally with your hands if something doesn’t feel good, without worrying about hurting their feelings.
  

• Try discovering yourself differently. The most important relationship anyone has is the one they have with themselves. If you feel as though you know everything that makes you feel good, it’s time to rediscover things about yourself that you didn’t know. Being willing to try new things is a wonderful way to increase self-awareness and body confidence in the new year! Every orgasm can feel different, especially if you get there using a new technique. Invest in a quality sex toy or lubricant or see if you can (safely) get creative around the house.

What Couples Should Consider

• Have sex in different ways. After a while in a relationship – sex can feel a little dull or like a chore. Try switching up your routine and incorporating new and exciting things in your sex life. Some ideas could be booking a hotel room for a night in your city, trying a sex toy, edging or teasing your partner, or pretending to be strangers at a bar.

• Being open and honest about your desires. Are there things you’d really like to try but feel silly asking? Ask anyway. The worst that can happen is that your partner says no. The best is that you explore your desires with someone you feel safe and comfortable with. Just ensure that there’s consent from all parties.
  

• It doesn’t have to be all about sex. Take your time with your partner by slowing things down during foreplay. Think of foreplay as a necessary part of having sex and getting turned on. It could be used to explore each other’s bodies and getting to know each other intimately besides having sex.

• Consider your health. Place importance on staying on top of your health both if you’re single or in a relationship. Consider getting tested to ensure both partners are up to date on their sexual health. Semen can throw off the delicate pH of the vagina, leading to nasty infections or discomfort. Make sure you’re prepared by keeping RepHresh or another odor-eliminating product on hand or taking a probiotic.

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