Give Your Kids the Gift of Really Hearing & Understanding (It's So Worth It)! by Cynthia Miller

Parenting Motherhood
a year ago
Give Your Kids the Gift of Really Hearing & Understanding (It's So Worth It)!

We all want to be really listened to – as in actually heard and understood. It's fundamental to human nature, so of course it's vastly important to children as well. It's just a lot harder to express yourself if you're a kid! I'm working hard on listening to my kids, as in what they are really saying, not simply hearing the words they're using.

  • When my daughter says, "You never spend as much time with me," she actually means: "Right now my sister is getting attention, and I'm feeling worried you love her more. I need reassurance. A hug would probably do it."
  • When a child says, "Mom you never understand!" she doesn't really mean I never understand. She means, "I feel so frustrated right now because I am feeling disconnected when you aren't understanding me, and it makes me scared and lonely and want to cry. I need you to look me in the eyes and focus on me."

These examples sound almost silly, they seem so obvious. But how many times have you wound up in a conversation or argument with a child who makes one of these statements? Yes, let me count the times. It takes practice to really hear your kids, but it's so worth it.

Anger Management in Kids: How to Diffuse Your Kid's Anger in 30 Seconds (It Works)!

Raising Positive Kids: Just What Are We Reinforcing? Think About It & Read This!

Why You Need to Stop Multitasking & Really Listen to Your Kids!

start discussion

Please login to comment.

recommended tips

Hot Chocolate Too Hot? Try This Delicious Way to Cool Hot Cocoa Down Fast!

How to Help Your Kids Recognize & Understand Their Feelings

Kids Whine? Try This Parenting Technique That Really Works!

My Family Wrote Bucket Lists: Here’s What We Learned About Life & Death

Got 30 seconds? Sign up for 30Seconds.com and get the best of our tips each week!