The Hidden Side of Miscarriage: Why Don't We Talk About It? by Janine Owens
I miscarried in 2011. I had a 3-year-old daughter at the time we found out we were (unexpectedly) pregnant. There were so many mixed emotions – happiness, fear, amazement and pure shock. I remember ordering a "Big Sister" shirt and took a picture of my daughter outside of our apartment complex on our way to our first ultrasound. The joy on her face was indescribable.
When we got to the doctor's office and after settling into the ultrasound table, I can remember every detail so clearly. The furrowed brow of our tech, the squinting of her eyes, the fleeting concern wash over her face that quickly turned to a professional look as she turned to us and said, "Let me get the doctor, I'll be right back."
That's the day we discovered that the baby had no heartbeat. No explanation why? "These things just happen," our doctor told us. I had a D&C about a week later. We went on to have two healthy, beautiful children, but the shadow of that miscarriage is always with me.
Why don't we talk about it? Why haven't I talked about it? Because it isn't something that can be explained. I don't have the reason for why we don't talk – but we should. Talk to a fellow mama. Talk to me.