No, You Don’t Get a Trophy for Showing Up: How We're Creating a Generation of Entitled Kids by Abbey North
A sticker on each correct worksheet; a certificate for participation; a free theme park ticket for reading; the more wrapping paper you sell for the PTA, the more prizes you get; if you read you get a pizza... Play on a rec sports team? We all get a trophy. It's your birthday? Come pick a prize. You attended a party? You get a goodie bag.
Your team didn't win? You don't get a trophy.
While I believe motivational tools and incentives have a time and a place, we have a generation of kids who feel entitled to whatever they want whenever they want it. Sure, not all kids. But too many kids feel they deserve a trophy for showing up. In life you will not get a trophy, certificate, prize or ribbon for doing what you are supposed to do anyway. How do we overcome this?
- Talk with your child about doing what they do because it's fun, not because they will get something.
- Explain to kids, you win some, you lose some. It's important to work hard in order to be successful.
- Talk about what it means to be a good sport. Turn this into a lesson on being happy for others, your turn will come.
And no, you do not get a trophy just because you showed up.