How Can I Support My Daughter Who Just Came Out As Gender Fluid & What Does That Mean? by Erin Wiley, MA, LPC, LPCC

a year ago

How Can I Support My Daughter Who Just Came Out As Gender Fluid & What Does That Mean?

Q: My daughter just came out as gender fluid. I’m not sure how that’s different than being gay or bisexual. I feel like I could have handled it better if I understood more. What does it mean, and what should a parent do at that moment? What can I say to be even more supportive?

A. Gender fluidity refers to the experience of feeling as if you do not fall into the rigid confines of being either exclusively “male” or “female.” Gender fluidity doesn’t affect who you might choose romantically or who you might be sexually attracted to. Gender identity (in this case ”fluid”) refers to how one perceives themselves, how one feels inside about themself in regard to their masculinity/femininity/lack of either/combination of both. Your sex is how the world identifies you at birth, based on your visible sexual organs (male/female/both). Your gender expression is how you present to the world.

If you have a child or friend who shares some information with you about their gender identity or sexuality, the best thing to do is to listen. Thank them for trusting you with that personal information. Let them know that you accept and love them no matter what they look like or who they love or how they experience their gender. Gender is only one thing that makes us human; it is not the sole defining thing about a person. To be supportive, be a good listener and learn to withhold comments or judgment. Ask questions and be interested in the new things this person is learning about themself and sharing with you. 

We get lots of great questions from our community members, and we have lots of great experts to provide answers. Have a question? Send it to us at and we'll do our best to get it answered for you! 

Note: 30Seconds is a participant in the Amazon affiliate advertising program and this post contains affiliate links, which means we may earn a commission or fees if you make a purchase via those links. The opinions or views expressed on do not necessarily represent those of 30Seconds or any of its employees, corporate partners or affiliates.

Take 30 seconds and join the 30Seconds community, and follow us on Facebook to get inspiration in your newsfeed daily. Inspire and be inspired.

Related Products on Amazon We Think You May Like:

30Second Mobile, Inc. is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to and affiliated sites.

LGBTQ Bullying: 5 Tips to Help You Talk to Your Kids & Support Them

National Coming Out Day: 7 Things Your LGBTQ Kids Want You to Know About Coming Out

Celebrating Uniqueness in Kids: How Parents Can Show Love Equally to Each Very Different Child

Coming Out As a Transgender Teenager: 13 Ways Parents Can Support & Love Their Trans Teen

Elisa Schmitz
What incredibly helpful information for parents, who are experiencing this more and more as awareness of the range of LGBTQ increases. Many thanks for sharing this great insight, Erin Wiley, MA, LPC, LPCC !
We have to support our kids, no matter what.

join discussion

Please login to comment.

recommended tips

Guy Time: Why It’s Important for the Entire Family (Including Mom)!

Puddle Parenting: Are You a Puddle Parent? Why This Dad Hopes You'll Practice This Parenting Style

Screen-Free Week: How & Why to Have a Social-Media-Free Weekend

Applying for College: Relax, Mom & Dad, High School Senior Stress Will Pass