The Lifelong Effects of Abusive & Toxic Relationships Part 2: Someone, Please Help Me Relationships

How cathartic it’s been to open up this Pandora’s box of abuse I experienced more than 30 years ago. And I’ve wondered why I’ve been guarded. But not really, I know why I am. I just don’t want to be that guarded anymore. It’s clearly holding me back. No more!

My story doesn’t end with just his private abuse in the high school parking lot. There are many stories that remain vivid in my memory.

This one begins with him grabbing me by my hair and throwing me down. It was dark. I can remember the only light was the streetlight. All the houses around us were dark. Families asleep.

We were at a high school party at my best friend's house. She had older brothers who were friends with him.

He started yelling at me. Accusing me of something that I hadn’t done. I argued back. “No! I would never!”

We were outside now. I remember him pushing me out the door of the house. I was crying. He grabbed me by my hair and threw me in a puddle.

I yelled and cried. I was five blocks away from my house, where my parents were sleeping, and they had no idea what I had been dealing with for the past year.

I finally fought back. I’m yelling. “Why?! I didn’t do anything!”

While I’m soaking wet and covered with mud, people came out and were yelling at me to be quiet or the cops were going to come and break up the party. I cried, explaining that he’d thrown me on the ground in the mud. Standing there dirty, soaked, crying, I pleaded. They told me to shut up.

He went inside. I turned around and left.

During that dark and terrifying walk alone to my house, muddied and humiliated, I decided I was going to tell my mom what really had been going on.

Someone, please help me!

The content on 30Seconds.com is for informational and entertainment purposes only, and should not be considered medical advice. The information on this site should not be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, and is not a substitute for professional care. Always consult your personal healthcare provider. The opinions or views expressed on 30Seconds.com do not necessarily represent those of 30Seconds or any of its employees, corporate partners or affiliates.

Take 30 seconds and join the 30Seconds community, and follow us on Facebook to get inspiration in your newsfeed daily. Inspire and be inspired.