How to Raise Independent Kids: Why It's Important for Children to Fail Parenting

Barb Desmarais
5 years ago

When parents are asked what kind of people they want their children to become, one thing that always makes the list is "independent."  We want them to be able to fend for themselves, solve problems and take full responsibility for their actions.

Despite being sure we want to raise independent adults, we are often quick to rescue when things go wrong, do things for them that they are capable of doing themselves, and allow them to point the finger at someone else when they make a mistake. We have difficulty with our kids experiencing failure.

We all know when we reflect back at our own lives that we learned the most through our mistakes. We became stronger when we got through adverse situations and we experienced enormous pride when we could say, "I did it!!" 

Let your kids experience failure. Allow them the opportunity to be able to say, "I did that all by myself," and give them the opportunity to save their own money to buy something they really want. Send a strong message of, "I know you can do this" and "I’m so proud of the way you worked through your problem." 

Teach them that mistakes are always a tool for learning.

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Comments (2)

Elisa Schmitz
Preach, Barb Desmarais ! This is spot on. We need to stop preventing our kids from failing. Failure is the best way to learn!
Mike Prochaska
Yes let kids “fall down” so they learn to get back up
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