Time for a Gut Check, Mom: Are You Doing Too Much for Your Kids? You May Be Surprised... Parenting Motherhood

I read an interesting tidbit recently that suggested one reason some babies and toddlers lag in their developmental milestones is because their parents are too attentive. Meaning, the kids never have to work for anything – they can just whine when a toy is out of reach and it appears.

I think I was guilty of this for a while. I wanted my daughter to know I was available to her, and so I'd jump for her every need. But there's a difference between meeting their physical and their emotional needs. When they can meet their own physical needs, they'll develop a sense of mastery.

So, notice what your child is capable of. Then push them just a little further. And help them notice this great thing they did, all on their own. Well-earned praise meets emotional needs better than (over) doing.

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Comments (6)

Elisa Schmitz
This is fascinating, hollybrownMFT ! And, it's not just when they're babies or toddlers. I see it playing out in the tween and teen years, too. Thanks for this important tip!
Holly Brown MFT
It often starts when they're little, and then it's hard to stop--once you're on that train, you can't get off easily because they've come to expect it. But it's something that can be changed, even if your kids will initially protest.
Ann Marie Patitucci
This is just an important topic, hollybrownMFT! Thank you! I just read it to my sons! I just discussed applications for 11 year olds with my oldest son! :)
Holly Brown MFT
Aw, thanks! So glad to hear it was useful!
Holly Budde
love this. my girls hate it when i say "no. get it yourself!" this makes me feel so validated!
Holly Brown MFT
Good for you, getting those girls moving!
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