Need to Get It Off My Chest: 23 Things I've Wanted to Say for Months by Tori Ulrich

3 years ago
Need to Get It Off My Chest: 23 Things I've Wanted to Say for Months

I have so many things to say about so many things that happened in the months that I have been MIA. Some things that make me feel rage, some that make me feel immense sadness, some that make me want to celebrate and squeal with glee, some nonsense, but all too much to imagine trying to put in separate posts to a million things. I just gotta get some shiz off my chest.

1. My friends are amazing and strong.

2. I gave up eating meat over a year ago and feel great about my choice for a million reasons. Those of you scared about the Amazon, get the f&ck on board and give up eating flesh. Each of the animals you consume not only kills the earth, but it kills a soul. Thank you to Lisa for helping me get here and for continuing to change the world with her badassery.

3. Our current president scares me more every day and I don't think that we are taking him seriously enough.

4. I learned a BRUTAL business-owner lesson this summer, but through it learned that I have more integrity and I run my business with more soul and awareness of others than most. It's gonna pay off in a major way one day. Mad props to Jordan and Jesse for having that integrity, too.

5. Endometriosis is a f&cking nightmare and watching it take things away from my friends makes me feel so helpless. My girl, Meg, is a warrior, and her husband, Will, is truly partner goals.

6. WE MUST LISTEN TO WOMEN. About health, about feelings, about stories and about trauma.

7. Most straight white men really have no idea how privileged they are. Some don't care to know, but some are working REALLY hard to know. I see you out there boys, keep that sh&t up.

8. I love living alone. I love Russell, and wouldn't change our roommate years for anything, but I really love living alone.

9. Some of my favorite people have suffered incredible trauma and loss in the last year and they are still kind, loving, incredible people. Watching them truly humbles me.

10. "Girl Boss" and "Lady Boss" or anything resembling either of these things are bullsh&t and they are not cool or witty or cute. I'm just the f&cking BOSS.

11. Groups of women that love each other and truly have each others' best interests at heart are unstoppable as a team. I have a Girl Gang, The Ladies, "church," literal soul sisters and ride-or-die (but stop for a sandwich first) crews. You know who you are and I love you forever.

12. The internet is horribly cruel to moms and it has to stop. Its ruining children and families and it's killing me to watch it.

13. Family is who you choose it to be. It's a feeling, not a bloodline.

14. Dating at 39 feels like its own kind of war sometimes. Please notice the friends in your life that are doing this and throw them a friggin' bone that doesn't include, "When you stop looking, you'll find it." When your friends say, "I'm looking for ____ in a person," really LOOK at the people in your life and see if you have someone they might like to meet. And a big shout out to Coach (Morgen) who really made me able to say this out loud.

15. Be careful when you tell a woman that men are intimidated by strong, independent, self-sufficient, cool women. These are qualities we are likely most proud of in ourselves of, so saying this feels like you are telling us we are keeping ourselves single, and that just feels sh&tty.

16. Trader Joe's Soy Chorizo is sent from angels.

17. You don't need to have birthed a human child to be a parent.

18. The smell of a hot glue gun is my happy place and I'd like someone to make this into a candle scent, thanks.

19. If I could make money from the dog hair tumbleweeds in my house I could buy Facebook.

20. The world feels like a hot nightmare a lot of the time right now and we really need to start being nicer to each other.

21. Camp Tanamakoon saved me from an almost certain fate, and when I have the money one day I will send every child to camp that I can.

22. Never underestimate the power of a good face masque at the end of the day, and thank you to Barret for making this easy for me to do.

23. Allison Janney is the queen of all things.

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Elisa Schmitz, 30Seconds
I could not love this any more, Tori Ulrich ! "I just gotta get some shiz off my chest." Yes, you did, and you vented about so many things that bother me, too. YES to listening to women. Heck yeah to being simply the The Boss. Groups of women all the way! And so much more I agree with and give you an "Amen, sister!" Thank you for sharing this. Preach!! Can't wait to hear what Ann Marie Gardinier Halstead , Renee Herren , Chef Gigi Gaggero , Donna John , Holly Budde , Meredith Schneider , Mindy Hudon, M.S., CCC-SLP, Sheri B Doyle , Stephanie Cannoe , Rick St. Peter , Terri Jones and others in our tribe think!
Tori Ulrich
HI! Thank you so much! I have been so taken aback by the enthusiastic love this post has gotten. It really started as a catch up on my life after being too busy for so many months, and then turned into a stream of consciousness and apparently a lot resonated with a lot of people! So funny how things work out like that! Maybe it'll be a series?! Shiz Liz(st)? XOXO
Elisa Schmitz, 30Seconds
Great way to catch people up on your life and let off some steam all at once! We would love it if you'd make it a series here - we will amplify the shiz out of your liz!! :-) Donna John
Elisa Schmitz, 30Seconds
PS: Tori Ulrich , I was just telling Donna John how I wish she had been able to meet you when she was here last year. She would love you as much as I do, my badass friend! xoxo
Terri Jones
I think we all need to take stock every once in a while ... and share we've learned. Love the part about not having to give birth to be a parent. Why isn't there maternity leave for adopting puppies, I ask you? Also, I absolutely despise the names we women bestow upon each other, i.e, Boss Babes makes me nauseous! I dated at 39 all the way up to 49 and it is a living hell. I kissed a whole frogdom. I love the idea of a series! Go for it!!
Sheri B Doyle
YES!!!! I am a vegetarian too, have been for 17 years. I don't judge those who eat meat but am really tired of being treated like an alien because I don't. And word to all the chefs out there, cook something without meat in it, just try it-it is not only possible it is delicious!
I am scared to death of this president too and can't understand why people aren't screaming from the rooftops-he is seriously screwing our country around the world and inciting hate in our country!
You are 100% right, you are the f%#@&ing boss, enough said, get the woman/girl out of it it is irrelevant, and we demean women everywhere when we use these terms.
As the step-mother to 2 boys and step-grandmother to 2 grandkids-trust me I love them with everything I have and it isn't less than anyone else has just because I didn't carry them in my body for 9 months. They have been in my life for 20 years, so when you have the nerve to tell me I am not a real parent or grandparent-step back because I might come out swinging at this point.

And to add one of my own- I am extremely pissed off that I have to teach my 16 year old granddaughter about how to defend herself against creepy men, how to fake bravery even in a dark parking lot at night just to keep from getting attacked, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY why there is no punishment for the boy who molested her best friend.
Mindy Hudon, M.S., CCC-SLP
You go girl! Love your spirt, feistiness, and all around honesty! You were my hero back in Chicago a year ago (picking up the country mouse and transporting her around town) and you are my hero now! Actually Elisa All Schmitz 30Seconds, I think it should be a book, "I just gotta get some shiz off my chest." I know it would be a best seller Tori Ulrich
Christie Gosch
Now I have to go and try the soy chorizo from Trader Joes! Thanks for sharing this awesome list, I love every one!
Mike Prochaska
I could be rich from dog hair too

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