Even Casual Relationships Can Be Meaningful: What I Learned From My Last Romantic Relationship by Dawn Taylor

Even Casual Relationships Can Be Meaningful: What I Learned From My Last Romantic Relationship

I’m not even sure if I should call my last relationship a relationship. Friends with benefits? A regular hookup? Regardless, it was pretty consistent for a two-year stretch, on and off, and it was amazing. 

He was a much younger man, and pretty ordinary, actually. But after a while I fell pretty hard, even though I knew it wasn’t going anywhere. Even if everything had been perfect (timing, ideal geography, etc.), he and I never would’ve worked. After the disastrous end to my marriage, I had stopped feeling anything. Yes, I had dated here and there and had some fun with great guys, but I had lost my ability to really care. I know now, looking back, that I was too scarred by what I had been through. 

John was sweet and, at times, a little immature (again, much younger!), but with him I felt safe and alive. Alive. I hadn’t felt that way for years. I had numbed my senses to protect myself, and even when I spent time with someone, I was simply going through the motions. With John, I was truly alive. I cried more than I had in years, both happy and sad tears. In his presence I was so overwhelmed with feelings, my senses took everything in. The light through the window was like artwork. The sound of Spotify playing music was like a symphony. His laugh the most beautiful sound I’d ever heard. Everything was magical because I felt it, truly felt it. 

He didn’t teach me to love again. He taught me to live again.

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Elisa All Schmitz 30Seconds
"He didn’t teach me to love again. He taught me to live again." I just love that, Dawn Taylor . You are right. Each relationship is an opportunity for growth and exploration. So glad you had this experience! cc: Jessica Lawrence
Elisa All Schmitz 30Seconds
I had hoped you would, Jessica Lawrence . Your writing and Dawn Taylor 's writing really speaks to me. Thank you both for your authenticity and all you share with us! cc: Donna John
Dawn Taylor
One of my favorite quotes of all time is from the beautiful movie Steel Magnolias where Shelby says "I would rather have thirty minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special." I have always looked at relationships that way, not as always having to be forever, but taken in the moment in time they exist. My unhappy marriage only convinced me I would rather many short term beautiful relationships than one miserable. :) Elisa All Schmitz 30Seconds
ccastell
I can relate to this - I have been spending a lot of time with a male friend. There is nothing romantic about our relationship, and never will be, but we see each other most days. And we laugh. I feel like we are in high school - just messing around and enjoying life. And to be honest, although I know that this time won't last forever, it is great to be with someone and just be myself and have fun.
Dawn Taylor
I totally understand how that feels and I am quite fine with fun at this point in my life especially after so much turmoil in marriage. It’s refreshing. ❤️
ccastell
I totally get that! And I love that there is zero conflict in the relationship, because it is just for fun.

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