Forget the Fork: Parents, Try to Survive the Mealtime Melee With Some Humor by Tracy Neubauer-Cunningham
Social media posts may show kids snacking on zucchini and avocado, but my kids rarely eat regularly, much less something cultivated! Post-second kid realization: comparisons to other parents is pointless. I have adopted a “save my sanity” adage.
- Make up your own reality. Dinner: potato hearts, tomato aioli and breaded fowl (aka french fries with ketchup and chicken nuggets).
- Never go to a restaurant! Dining out requires anxiously awaiting management to ask you to leave and paying for a meal that no one will eat while coaxing kids out from under the table or discouraging playing with the hair of the lady sitting behind you.
- STAY HOME! This is where I say f#ck the fork! Eat spaghetti with your hands, take off your clothes and sit naked at the table; we’ll hose you down later.
- Food they liked yesterday they don’t like today! Re-examining why Gram’s fish sticks are better? Pointless! Same box, same store. But mine taste like roadkill scraped off a desert highway.
- Don’t self-loathe if sole craving is fruit snacks! Throw them a bag of “shut the hell ups.”
Parents: celebrate keeping the kids alive one more day. Snap 10 to 800 pics of them smiling for proof of survival!
Take 30 seconds and join the 30Seconds community. Inspire and be inspired.
Related Products on Amazon We Think You May Like:
Funny Parenting Books $4 & Up
30Second Mobile, Inc. is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.