​Childhood Sexual Abuse: Not Talking to Your Kids About Their Bodies Is Parental Malpractice by Stacey Honowitz

Opinion Parenting
3 years ago

​Childhood Sexual Abuse: Not Talking to Your Kids About Their Bodies Is Parental Malpractice

I had a 3-year-old in my office the other day; three and a half years old and she was able to talk – and she was able to talk about what Daddy did. The problem is that many kids are not able to talk specifics because they aren't taught about all of their body parts at a young age.

Nobody wants to talk about their private parts. Nobody wants to talk about being violated, and nobody wants to go in front of a crowd and have to talk about their vagina or their breasts or their butt. But identifying body parts at a young age with the anatomically correct names is critical.

The message is clear: talking about private parts is not taboo; others touching private parts is taboo. If a child does come to you to report sexual abuse, there are a few questions you should ask:

  • When?
  • Where?
  • Show me what they did.
  • Did they say anything to you? 

And then leave the rest to law enforcement to investigate. As an attorney, I advise parents not to ignore an outcry and not to put words in a child's mouth.

Having witnessed and cross-examined perpetrators, having heard the stomach-turning testimony of young children time and again, I decided to write a book to jump-start the conversation parents should be having with kids. My first body safety book, My Privates Are Private, is easy for kids to read and understand.

Learn more at StaceyHonowitz.com.

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Elisa Schmitz
THIS: "The message is clear: talking about private parts is not taboo; others touching private parts is taboo." So important. Thank you for sharing this vital information with our community, Stacey Honowitz . Welcome to our community of writers. I hope you will keep shining a light on this very important subject!
Stacey Honowitz
Thanks so much , I’m trying to spread the word and I appreciate your nice comments !
Donna John
Such an important topic, Stacey Honowitz . More people need to talk about this, instead of sweeping it under the rug. Our kids need to know their body parts, and adults need to stop turning red when someone says "penis," "vagina," etc. I am so happy you are part of our community. Welcome.
Stacey Honowitz
Thank you . It’s great to have feedback and I like to lecture to various groups about this issue .. I’m here just let me know !
Jessica Acree
SO IMPORTANT!! I have a 3, almost 4 year old, we have tried really hard to be honest with her about parts of our body, their PROPER names (no cutesy crap) and that it’s off limits to anyone but her. The possibility of her being put in that position without a voice is terrifying.
Stacey Honowitz
Good job.. always ha e open and honest communication .. knowledge is power ..

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