Kids & Lying: Children Who Lie & The Parents Who Love Them by Tanya Kuzmanovic
Something that only happens to clueless and disconnected parents happened to me the other day. My darling child looked me in the eyes and lied right to my stupid, trusting face. And my heart broke a bit.
While I quickly came to terms with my little angel being a two-bit, lying demon, I couldn't wrap my head around it. It didn't make sense. Why lie when the truth could be easily checked? And so, I did what any modern parent does when faced with a conundrum – I took to the Internet to find out where I went wrong. And according to the experts out there, I went wrong in several key areas:
- I took the lie personally (my poor broken heart), which gave it undue power.
- I didn't stop to think about the underlying reasons behind the lie (a hopeful bluff or a stalling tactic).
- I didn't separate the behavior from the child. ("My kid lied" as opposed to "My kid is a no-good, lying demon.")
But here’s what I did right:
- I handed down consequences to hit the child where it hurt. Two sets – one for the infraction and one for the lie.
- I learned two valuable lessons: Sometimes I will need help in dealing with my kids, and sometimes they will look directly into my eyes and tell a lie.
How do you handle it when your kids lie?