Zentivity: Are You Mostly Love & Light, But Still Want to Deck Somebody Sometimes? Read This! by Marianne Clyde

6 years ago

Zentivity: Are You Mostly Love & Light, But Still Want to Deck Somebody Sometimes? Read This!

I recently got an email from a Zentivity.guru member telling me that she is a meditator, and she believes in all the mindfulness principles of a Zentivity™ lifestyle. They are:

  • Connect with your creator.
  • Know your true identity. 
  • Nurture awareness. 
  • Just breathe. 
  • Respect.
  • Gratitude. 
  • Limit judgments. 
  • Detach. 
  • Communicate clearly. 
  • Forgive quickly. 

But she is torn apart by the fact that every now and then, she just gets so angry that she just wants to smack someone. She was wondering what's wrong with her? Why does this one particular person really set her teeth on edge? Why can't she get a handle on her emotions?

My guess is you, the reader, might feel that way, too, sometimes.

You are not alone. Feelings are normal. We all have triggers that threaten to set us off. I experience negative feelings every day, too. Some people just have a talent for getting under your skin. They may never change. Stressors will always be around. We just don't have to be thrown off balance by them.

I do have to say that regular practice of these principles really do change your brain. They help you be less reactive. They help you see others from a more inclusive, compassionate perspective. They help you be calm and see things from different perspectives. They help you be more productive.

However, as long as you are human, you will experience feelings, reactions and triggers. What mindfulness principles do is keep you from being thrown into a tizzy from those reactions. They help you grow and learn better coping skills. What is important is what you do with those reactive thoughts, those triggers, those feelings. You learn to know your true identity, which is one of love, joy, peace, creativity, abundance and wisdom. Once you know that true identity, you learn to operate from that place more and more, making your world and the world around you happier, calmer and more productive. You become better at problem solving and, little by little, you begin to change the world.

There is no magic bullet that makes you non-human. These principles just make you better at bringing a bit more humanity to a world that is sorely in need of that. And the more of us that are operating from that place of wholeness, the better world we are creating.

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Elisa Schmitz
Thank you for keeping it real, Marianne Clyde ! As much as we want to be love and light all the time, some days are just tough. Love your insights and supportive feedback, thank you! ❤️
S Roberts
I’m pretty easygoing and as long as it’s just me against the world can usually either ignore or proactively confront someone’s annoyance if it’s directed to me, which is very disarming. The ones I struggle with though are parents of my kid’s friends who interfere in situations that if left to the kids will resolve its. Instead they try to drag everyone into it and usually have about an 80% success rate because in doing so the kids get dragged into it as well. And who isn’t going to fend for their kid when an adult is attacking them? Not that this happens that often, but when it does there are usually a few casualties and I would appreciate any advice as to how to handle these people/situations.
Marianne Clyde
Hi Stacey. How aggravating. Since you are not going to be able to change your kid's friends' parents, I wonder what would happen if you just let it go for the moment and then asked your child later, "What would you have done to solve the problem, if so and so hadn't stepped in?" That way you still empower your child to think for himself. You are right, people are drawn into drama pretty easily, but that's when they lose their own power. Take a deep breath and detach whenever you can.
S Roberts
I have a Mama Bear side to me that’s bigger than myself that takes over In situations like this, so if you mess with my cubs...let’s just say nobody is above reproach. So thank you for that great advice to step back then ask my child that question, which I’ll TRY to remember if I’m in that position again.
Marianne Clyde
Ha! Your kids are fortunate that you lovingly protect them... hang in there!
Toni B
The bitter makes the better a bit brighter...say that 3x quickly. You need all the colors to appreciate the rainbow. So, even when we're faced with negative moments or stress, it's a good reminder how great the good things are.
Marianne Clyde
That's quite a tongue twister! But you are right, it helps us appreciate the good!

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